The abuse started when I was 11. It escalated at 13. I was raped by a rabbi at 18. I overdosed at 23. Followed by a psych ward for 1 month where I was raped by an orderly while in the 'cooler'. I'm now 44 and it won't go away. Growing up I thought it was normal to be forced. Well I didn't actually think it was normal. Went to my first shrink at 16 because I was having eating problems. No appetite. None. He was a rabbi and psychologist. He told me that if I put up a fight I would become a homosexual. He actually told me that it was normal to have sex with guys my age and even older men. I got kicked out of the dormitory because I liked girls. I never had even held hands or gone on a date. My sin was that I talked on the phone!!! By time I was in my late 20's, I was a male prostitute, albeit married. You know the men who have sex in the park. I walked around totally naked.