I just want share my life with all who have been suffering. Maybe, to
suffer is part of life. I don't know.
I am 28 now and was diagnosed as suffering from Bipolar at the age of
26. Difficult enough, I was once a suffering of Bulimia nervosa. My
illness developed at 15 from Major depression to Bipolar Affective
Disorder I at 26 which was the time for my first mania.
The swinging pattern of moods seem to be part of me, so is my jobs and
history. I can never have harmonious relationship with people around
me. Who understands? I doubt, especially in a place where you can find
no support group... a place in Hong Kong.
I have been tired of the time of burying myself in bed... I am tired of
escaping from people.
I want to be helped. I consulted a school counsellor at the age of 15.
(He was so ignorant of my illness despite my insomnia.) I was sexually
harassed by him at the age 17-18, which I did not know until 7 years
later. I know I was in a mess...
What do I want now? I don't really know. All I know is that whenever I
am in love with people, I bound to be depressed... I don't welcome my
mania neither.
I am very tired. I want to be helped. I know there are a lot of people
like me. I don't believe in Jesus. Damn holy shit. (Pardon me!) I
believe in love, in understanding and support.
I want to live and first rule in life is to survive despite the
circumstances. Hope my sharing can lift up you depressed mood or
console you elevated mood. Despite misunderstanding of the family and
friends, I want all sufferers to know that you are not alone.
Love,
Zoe